i have a big mod cock.

1) HOLES IN PURSES. I found $7 worth of change (and a $1 bill) in my purse that I didn't even know was there because it was stuck between the outside layer and the lining. I LOVE my purse. I don't want a new one. I can't convince myself to get a new one either. So I guess I have to buck up and sew that hole.

2) PAGERS. The point of a pager is thus: You call the pager, leave your number/extension, hang up. The person with the pager then calls you back. SO WHY DOESN'T ANYONE EVER CALL ME BACK WHEN I PAGE THEM?! Granted, there was that one time when I kept paging the person to call the operator (I am le dumb) but I've made sure that I pressed my extension every time since then. If they don't start answering, I'm going to start overhead paging and I don't care.

3) DUMB PEOPLE WHO PUT $5 BILLS IN VENDING MACHINES. Speaks for itself, yes?

4) THE CONCEPT OF NEW YORK CITY. I don't understand it. Joe and I had a 30-minute conversation on the concept of NYC and I still don't get it. I thought the "Big Floater" was all New York City, but apparently that is only LONG Island or one of the boroughs or something. Manhattan is a little island and a borough, Ellis Island is a smaller island but not a borough, and other parts of NYC and other boroughs are not even islands - they're part of the NY triangle. I asked him if New York state was shitting out the boroughs and I don't think Joe thought it was funny. I also don't understand how you can put "New York, New York + Zip Code" when you really should say "Manhatten, NY + Zip" and it still gets to the right place. I can't put Rome, NY on an envelope to have it delivered to Floyd, NY, SO WHY CAN THEY?!

5) MY NEW NECKLACE. It's a geode - but Sarah said it looks like bacon D=.

6) STEVE & BARRY'S. Please do not go out of business. Where am I supposed to buy all my work clothes? I got two pairs of pants, a hoodie and a necklace for $28... WHERE AM I SUPPOSED TO DO THAT OTHER THAN S&B'S?! ILUBB plz to be making moar $$.

7) MEMORIALS FOR PLACES WITH TERRORIST ATTACKS. I.E., THE WORLD TRADE CENTER. Let's think about this logically. If Iraq were to put a memorial in every site that terrorists (A.K.A., the United States) has bombed them, there wouldn't be any room to walk in Iraq. I personally feel like we should leave the WTC site alone - 5,000 people died there. I understand that the site has been cleaned out, but how many bodies were never found? THAT'S BECAUSE THEY WERE INCINERATED. Building a new office building/memorial on top of the site is A) like building offices over a cemetary and B) inviting terrorists to do it again. Iraq might have it right - if it's bombed, leave it be. Don't make it a bigger spectacle than it already is.