I still wonder all the time if I fought as hard as I could have and should have to make the relationship work. I still wonder why I threw it all away because I wake up every morning and think "I shouldn't be alone here." I still wonder if the impetus was really worth it like I thought it was, because my phone doesn't ring when it's supposed to and I don't feel complete like I wanted to and it makes me self-medicate to the point of withdrawal of everything else. I wonder why I can't see him and not cry and I wonder how I can even bear to hang out with him when all I want to do is make it okay. I still wonder if he thinks that I didn't put 100% into the relationship... and I wonder if he'll ever think otherwise.

It's been a month and I still wonder if I made the biggest mistake of my life.